


we are deaf (we are numb)

by tinyconstellations



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst, Blood, F/F, Hanahaki Disease, Oblivious Clarke, Protective Anya, Protective Raven, Sad Lexa, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-12
Updated: 2019-01-12
Packaged: 2019-10-08 16:38:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 628
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17389898
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tinyconstellations/pseuds/tinyconstellations
Summary: The Hanahaki Disease is an illness born from unrequited love, where the patient’s throat will fill up with flower, they will then proceed to throw, and cough up the petals, (sometimes even the flowers).One of the only ways for the disease to ‘disappear’ is if, the said person returns the feeling (it can’t be resolved with friendship, it has to be genuine feelings of romantic love).orClarke is in love, but not with Lexa





	we are deaf (we are numb)

**Author's Note:**

> Gardenias: Secret Love

**_“darlin', don't you, stand there watching, won't you_ **

**_come and save me from it?_ **

**_darlin', don't you, join in_ **

**_you're supposed to_ **

**_drag me away from it”_ **

**_-sedated, hozier_ **

 

 

 

 

* * *

 

The first time it happens, she wakes up absolutely terrified, with the worst pain imaginable in her chest, she coughs for what feels like hours until finally, _finally,_ a single object tears its way out of her throat. It’s a flower.

 

A gardenia.

 

Her chest hurts, and head is pounding, and her hands are shaking, and the flower’s beautiful white petals are covered in blood.

 

She takes several steadying breaths and googles the hell out of what happened on her phone.

 

She doesn’t find much, just a few research papers and some cases of people who started to vomit bloody flowers out of nowhere, some of them say they magically stopped after a while, others just deteriorated until their lungs gave up.

 

Horrified, she sits on the floor next to her bed and cries out in pain as she feels another flower stuck on her throat.

 

“What is happening to me?”, she whimpers before her throat starts itching again and she coughs out three more flowers.

 

* * *

 

Lexa is grateful her roommate wasn’t home last night because, if she had been, she would’ve woken up and demanded an explanation as to why she sounded like she had tuberculosis.

 

She likes Raven, she really does but, explaining to her -to anyone really- why she’s suddenly puking flowers is not something she feels like doing. Plus, she doesn’t know why, either.

 

“Hey, Lexa!”, she hears her favorite voice calling out to her.

 

She’s on their favorite café, waiting for her order to be done.

 

“Clarke”, Lexa says breathlessly, “how’s your day going?”

 

Clarke gives her a disarming smile. “Great now that I got to see your cute little face”, she winks.

 

Lexa wished Clarke’s flirty personality didn’t still get to her after so many years. She blushes and tries to hide it with her hair. She fails.

“Why are you so happy today?”, she asks.

  
Clarke’s smirk morphs into a sheepish grin. “Finn asked me to be his girlfriend last night”.

 

Lexa feels a petal tickling her throat and all the air leaves her lungs.

 

“Oh… wow, that’s um, great!”, she croaks out after a few torturous seconds. “I’m uh guessing you said yes?”

 

She prays the answer is no.

 

"Of course I did! Lex, you know I've been waiting for him to ask forever", Lexa did know, she was just hoping that Clarke would magically reciprocate her feelings.

 

"Lexa!", she hears the voice of the barista, perfect timing.

 

Lexa can still feel the petal.

 

"I have a class in ten minutes, Griff", she stands up and grabs her bag. "I'll see you later and you can tell me all about Collins then", Lexa says over her shoulder before taking her coffee and swiftly exiting the establishment.

 

She takes a sip of coffee on her way to class and it seems to soothe the ache on her throat.

 

* * *

 

 

The next time it happens, she's laying on her bed scrolling through her Instagram feed.

 

She watches a video someone took of the party where Clarke and Finn became a thing. It's the two of them dancing close to each other, Clarke's smile then is the most beautiful thing she has ever seen, even in a grainy video recorded by some drunk college student, she can see that Clarke is truly happy.

 

Her chest tightens, and she coughs four individual petals before an entire flower comes out, then another one, and another one. She can't stop coughing and the sight of the bloody flowers coming out of her and staining her hands makes her cry in desperation.

 

"Oh my God, Lexa? What the hell?"

 

**Author's Note:**

> hey guys this is my first fic so, i'm sorry for the 234782564378 mistakes you'll find. 
> 
> i took some liberties with this so i'm sorry about that too.
> 
> also if any of you would like to beta this story hmu.


End file.
